Gettin' There

This is the part where I say that I have turned over a new leaf and am embracing everyday as a new day and not getting caught up with the past or what I aspire for the future. Yeah, not so much. It is going to be a slow road to get to that point, but it is a road that I am on and willing to continue taking. I am still having a hard time not focusing on what I am not apart of....do you ever feel like you are missing out on something?
I have taken a big step that will truly help me if I am diligent....so far so good. I have put myself out there and became 100% transparent because I know that is what I have to do in order to make progress. I realized recently that I have come soooooooo far from where I used to be in terms of my anxiety, and then realized that maybe anxiety is not the root of my issue. It has brought to my attention twice in three days that I may just be guilt ridden. In a previous post I wrote how I want to make things right with my mom and strive for that relationship that "normal" mother and daughters have. It was brought to my attention that it is not my fault that our relationship is the way that it is....it has not been decisions that I have made. I have allowed myself to think that I am less of a person because of it....I guess I feel more guilty than I should. I can't fully say at this point "that's true, I am just feeling guilty....problem solved" I'll work on it though. God is giving me more strength each day in allowing me to over come thoughts and worries.